Emotional Intelligence-?Why is it Important? IQ used to be talked about frequently, which refers to intelligence quotient. Gradually, I find that whether I could get along well with my classmates, whether I could keep calm and restraint when treated unfairly or whether I could control my bad emotions without hurting others’ feelings, all of which have nothing to do with how difficult math problems I’m able to solve or how big educational results I can achieve. Although I start to quest the secrets of emotional intelligence, the concept is till not clear enough to me, why is it important and how does it affect me?
I will be discussing and looking into the importance of emotional intelligence from different aspects of our life in this paper. The concept of emotional intelligence is vague to many people. Basically emotional intelligence is a person’s ability to identify, deal with and manage emotions in positive ways and capacity of a high degree of self- awareness and a skill of empathy. Initially, Edward Thornier (sass) describes the concept of “social intelligence” as the ability to get along with other people, which loud be the origin of emotional intelligence.
Svetlana Laconic (2012) points out in his article “The Role and Importance of Emotional Intelligence in Knowledge Management” that there are four main essential skills of emotional intelligence: Self- awareness, which means the ability to understand the emotions and actions of ourselves; Self-management, which means that people can manage feelings and control bad emotions; Empathy, which also can be called as social-awareness, meaning the ability to understand what others are thinking or feeling and to monomaniac with other people effectively; Motivation, which means always being able to encourage oneself when facing troubles or under pressure.
These four elements are easy to explain, but really have huge effects on people’s quality of relationships, career success and overall happiness. Firstly, I’d like to talk about how emotional intelligence affects our communication and relationship satisfaction. Communication is essential to people no matter during the daily life or in workplaces. Everyone needs to communicate with different people almost anytime and anywhere. Good and effective communication can enhance cooperation, strengthen relationships and build trust. Without fully understanding each other, in other words without self-awareness and social-awareness, people are unable to make good interactions. Happiness is built on constructive communication.
For example, couples who are able to have mutual understanding and to discuss their problems are more likely tend to figure out their conflicts positively and avoid the same conflict next time. Thus the relationship satisfaction is increased. (Christensen, Sheen, 1995) On the there hand, the relationship satisfaction of couples who always demand and withdraw rather than try to understand and express feelings actively tend to decline over time. (Heavy, Christensen,; Malamute, 1995) The better communication constructed, the fewer conflicts exist. For instance, when someone is clear about the needs of others after a good negotiation, it is easy for him or her to perceive what to give, thus conflicts can be reduced effectively.
It is believed that once people could master soft skills such as listening attentively to others and comforting people roper, they would live a much happier and healthier life. And all of these are attributed by emotional intelligence. Daniel Coleman, a psychologist and science journalist, who first brought the term ” emotional intelligence” to the audience with his 1995 book named “Emotional Intelligence” and applied this concept to business, says that when he calculated ‘Q, emotional intelligence and technical skills as elements of remarkable performance, he found that emotional intelligence proved to be twice as important as the other two ingredients for work as a whole. Distinguished dervish is presented through strong motivation, strategic foresight, empathy, self-regulation and communication skills.
A good leader is not a person who is always forcing employers to work, but a friend of employers who often shows empathy, understanding and inspirations to benefit everyone as a whole. Thus the trust and strong bonds between two sides are built, and employers are motivated to work more efficiently. To be honest, it is difficult to occupy every skill of emotional intelligence, but what people do know is that emotions play a very important role in our overall reflections career, even more significant than the role of our actual brain intelligence. Ultimately, I want to discuss self-regulation, which is an essential component of emotional intelligence.
Self-regulation is easy to understand, which refers to the ability to control emotions and to have thorough Judgment before acting and which also means showing positive emotions to others and feeling positive emotions of oneself. As Stephen Covey (1989) says that people should have the ability to choose the best response to the situation rather than becoming the salve to impulsive emotions. Sometimes people are really regretful about our actions driven by bad emotions, which are lack of think and Judgment. If bad emotions couldn’t be controlled timely, people would be disappointed with themselves over time, and then lose their confidence. Though the bad moods should be controlled timely, people should not ignore the existence of positive emotions that can infuse new blood to our life.